LAUGH
For National Teachers Appreciation Week, we teachers are used to getting a gift card, a cutesy mug, and some free food. While these treats are definitely appreciated, we long for more untraditional, intangible things this time of year. Here are 15 things we teachers REALLY want for Teacher Appreciation Week:
1. An hour of pure, unadulterated silence.
We don’t want to hear “HE’S TOUCHING ME!” screamed over and over in the confines of a windowless classroom. We want an hour of no talking, no screaming, no poking. We will gladly take a gift card to one of those sensory deprivation tanks where all you can hear is the sound of your own breathing.
2. A day where our opinion actually matters.
As people who are on the front lines of battle every single day, we have some pretty strong opinions on how we can make our schools even better for our students than they already are. We’d love to not only be asked about our ideas but actually have some of them implemented.
3. A copier that doesn’t make us yell profanities at an inanimate object.
Copiers can sense fear and desperation and they always seem to break down when you need them to suck it up and work. Why are these machines so temperamental? Someone call Apple and have them develop a new prototype STAT!
4. Someone to cover one of our many duties.
Besides, you know, actually TEACHING, many of us also have morning/after school/recess duty. While we love chatting with students, constantly having to play referee gets a bit tiring. If someone could cover one of our duties, we would be forever indebted.
5. A feasible budget that lets us buy necessary supplies for our students.
We’d like to be able to buy educational supplies that take our students’ learning to the next level.
6. A day of saying whatever the hell we want.
“Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth?” “Boy, have you lost your mind? Cuz I’ll help ya find it!” If only we could say the many things that race through our brains each day. It would be incredibly cathartic.
7. An update from a former student, telling us how they are doing.
We put in so much time, thought, and energy into molding lives and then our students just grow up and magically vanish. Come back and tell us how you are! We want to see you as a fully functioning human being and we want to hear your accomplishments. It’s nice to know that our hard work pays off sometimes!
8. No angry parent emails for a week.
As teachers, we normally hear more complaints than compliments. We’d love a week free of irate parents questioning our choice to hold their children accountable for their actions.
9. A day to do whatever we want with our own family.
Our poor families often get neglected due to the sheer workload (both mental and emotional) of the long workday. We want one day where we can connect with our families and put the focus on them for a change!
10. Jeans week.
Please just let us wear jeans. We promise to put a blazer over it and call it a professional day.
11. A shopping spree for classroom supplies.
Joy is throwing random things in your cart that you can actually pay for. It’s been a while since we have gone on a shopping spree. Mention an all-expenses-paid trip to Staples and we feverishly start dreaming of flair pens.
12. The ability to get a sneak peek at next year’s class list.
We wait all summer to see who we are going to have – just give us a quick look so we don’t spend half of our break suffering in anticipation!
13. A really really really long nap.
We are all looking forward to sleeping until 2025. Don’t wake us up. Let us sleep away the frustration, worries, and exhaustion of the 2019-2020 school year
14. A magic wand to transform the rough home lives of some of our students
If we could magically “Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo” them like the fairy godmother we so wish to be, that would be great. It’s really hard to expect a child to learn when some of their most basic needs are not met, and when we can’t really do anything about them.
15. A simple thank you in the form of a meaningful letter.
The best gifts for teachers are handwritten notes from students, telling us how we have made an impact on them. We don’t need anything fancy. A simple “I appreciate you and your hard work” goes a long way!
