LAUGH
Jess from Bored Teachers came up with a hysterically accurate viral video that details how a teaching miracle meal takes place literally every day of our teaching careers.
The dinner analogy goes a little something like this. Picture it. Twenty-five people are coming over for a dinner party, and you have a food critic amongst the group making sure everything is delicious, delightful, and delicate.
Here is how it plays out:
Hi everyone. Come in and take a seat. Dinner will be ready in a few minutes. I have placeholders for where you will sit.
No, you cannot change your place card to sit by your friend. It’s just plain disrespectful.
1. Resources are scarce
Wait a minute, I’m short a chair. Excuse me for a moment while I go to Mr. Jones’ house next door and borrow one. Be right back.
I hope you like the brand-new silverware I purchased with my own money as I didn’t have enough spoons to go around; got them on sale at Dollar Tree.
2. Needs will be met.
We will be eating buffet style as I know some of you don’t eat gluten, some are vegetarian, some are vegan, and some of you are just downright picky eaters. It’s perfectly fine, as I have managed to accommodate everyone’s needs.
I have also added supplements to the dishes because I know some of you have vitamin deficiencies in different areas.
Oh, and I didn’t use any peanut products because many of you have peanut allergies but just don’t know it yet.
Standards are on the refrigerator if you are questioning your meal, but I know you will just act like you are reading them, so…
3. Following directions is tough.
You don’t understand the directions. They are very simple. Sit the heck down and wait for dinner.
I don’t care if you are not hungry. I have made 25 intricate and well-planned main dishes, and you can at least take a few bites.
Wait, why is…John leaving the table to watch football, Maria rocking the chair I brought over from the neighbors back and forth, and Sally spitting out her food all over the table?
All the while you, Mr. Food Critic, are just scribbling notes feverishly on your napkin and not helping me one bit.
No, the dinner is not over!!!!!!!!!
4. Things don’t go as planned.
I must follow the plan exactly, or the food critic will give me a poor write-up.
Why are you all asking to use the bathroom at the same time? I only have two. Argh!!!
Thank you for getting back to your meal. How does it taste? You didn’t like the fish? But you are a vegetarian! I’ll just run back into the kitchen, add some spices to it, and rework it a bit.
If you don’t like it, then the food critic is over there with juice and a bag of chips; enjoy!
What’s that beeping? OMG the smoke alarm is going off. Everyone hold your ears and head outside.
5. We do it again the next day.
And, even after the train wreck of a meal, we will return the next day to cook again.
Relatives will complain the meal wasn’t good enough, and everyone will think we should make better meals and get paid hardly anything because we simply love cooking.
And that is teaching in a nutshell.
